We all have our own stories for how our identity formed. Some of these stories are full of beauty and can serve us really well. As a 2nd-generation Asian American, my family of origin’s immigration story speaks of resiliency and dedication in a way that brings me pride and motivation. The meaning we make behind these stories can bring inner awareness and help us grow.
Other stories can get in the way. We might have critical self-talk that has grown so powerful that we don’t think to second guess it (e.g. “I’m not articulate enough to have that conversation.”) Or we might have adopted a story that society gave us (e.g. “I’ll let that slide because people like me are accommodating.”) A story might even be so subtle that we don’t realize we are telling it to ourselves.
Narrative Therapy encourages us to consider how we might “re-author” these stories to have more ownership over our lives.
What is Narrative Therapy?
Narrative therapy is an approach that helps people view themselves as separate from their problems and behaviors, rather than inherent to who they are as people. In narrative therapy, the therapist and client explore the stories behind identity-formation together; then they work to uncover the meaning behind those stories so that the client can decide whether they want to keep them, or write new ones.
Language is seen as an important tool in narrative therapy because it serves as one of the primary means by which all people express their experiences, explore their stories, assign meaning, and ultimately, create change.
While each narrative therapist may practice differently, there are some common underpinnings that I’ll explain below:
Sociocultural context: All stories are told within their relational, systemic, political, and cultural contexts. Narrative Therapy distinguishes between “dominant stories” (stories which are told primarily by those in power) and “subjugated stories” (stories which are often sidelined.) Therapists may encourage clients to identify possible dominant stories in their narrative to deconstruct them together.
Social construction: A foundational principle of narrative therapy is that our personal realities are organized and maintained through narratives. This means that we can create change by the simple (but difficult!) act of altering how we talk about something. Deconstructing language is an important part of narrative therapy.
Role of the therapist: In narrative therapy, the therapist adopts something called the “not-knowing” stance. Since realities are socially constructed, only the client can have full knowledge of their experience. So, rather than diagnosing or advising, a narrative therapist asks questions that draw out the knowledge, strength, and experience that is already carried within the client’s existing narratives.
What Happens in a Narrative Therapy Session?
From Narrative Therapy by Jill Freedman and Gene Combs: “I feel as though I have been sitting on a path that has become overgrown with briar and thorns, closing me in and torturously leaving me witness to my shrinking options. And Jill now stands around me and whacks down the brush so that I can see which path I want to take. She has opened up the options and so the opportunities become mine for the choosing.”
At its heart, Narrative Therapy is about questions. The therapist leans into their “not-knowing” stance to understand the client’s existing narrative and its meaning. They then shift the questions to co-create a client’s preferred new story.
How a client experiences a Narrative Therapy session depends on many factors, including the therapeutic relationship, but some key strategies of a Narrative Therapist are listed and explained below:
Externalizing: This is probably the most defining tool of Narrative Therapy. Narrative Theory sees problems as separate from the individuals that experience them. Then, it uses language to help people distance themselves from those problems. For example, instead of saying “what kinds of things happen that lead to you becoming sad?”, a narrative therapist might ask “in what context is the sadness most likely to take over?”. This positions the sadness as a problem to be tackled, rather than an inevitable part of a person’s experience.
Alternative story: A narrative therapist will work with a client to co-author a new story. The idea is to take power away from an existing narrative and place it back into the client. Narrative therapists use terms like “preferred realities” or “preferred stories” to emphasize the agency a client might have in writing their own narrative for themselves.
Unique outcomes: It can be so difficult to re-write a story that we have told ourselves for our whole lives. A Narrative Therapist will attempt to open space for new stories by exploring exceptions to a dominant story. An important part of Narrative Therapy is celebrating and amplifying experiences which contradict existing narratives.
The Benefits of Narrative Therapy
Narrative therapy can be beneficial for people experiencing a variety of presenting issues, from anxiety or depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, relationship struggles, family conflict, addiction, and more.
Narrative therapy can offer several benefits:
It can provide greater awareness of how you came to be who you are today
It can help you make sense and meaning of your experiences
It can improve self-esteem
It can empower you and increase the agency you feel to manage problems and conflict
Is Narrative Therapy Right for Me?
Narrative therapy may be right for you if:
You are looking to build insight or awareness of yourself
You want to shift your thoughts or beliefs about yourself
You have negative self-talk
For couples: if you both find yourselves experiencing the same event…but have vastly different interpretations of it
Narrative Therapy in Chicago
If the stories you've been telling yourself about your life are getting in the way, let's rewrite them together. Our therapists at ECC are here to help you deconstruct the stories you believe about yourself and write new stories that help you take ownership of your life in powerful ways. Fill out an intake form to get started today.
ABOUT ECC:
Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for relationships, families, children & teens, and individuals in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we work with clients to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit their needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.