Why Do We Fall in Love with the Idea of Someone?

In this article:

• Why do we fall in love with the idea of someone at first?

• How to get to know someone for real in the age of online dating

• Am I idealizing my partner? How to check in with yourself

• What to do when the rose-colored glasses come off

• How to build real intimacy with your partner

• Relationship therapy for individuals and partners

If you’ve ever been in a romantic relationship, the experience of having rose-colored glasses (and then taking them off) might feel familiar. You fantasize about the life you might build with this other person: exciting dates and travel experiences, building a long-term partnership, perhaps buying a home and having children with them. But the longer you’re with them, the reality is different  from what you imagined. Your partner might be a little (or a lot) different than you first thought, and the truth is, so are you. 

Why do humans fall in love with the idea of someone, rather than the actual person? What function does this serve in the course of a relationship? Should we avoid doing it? How do we handle it when we start to see our partners for who they really are, and they’re different from who we expected? It turns out there are actually some very good answers for all of this.

Why Do We Fall in Love with the Idea of Someone at First? 

You might have seen a few memes about this topic floating around the internet: 

Despite what these memes might lead us to believe, falling in love with the idea of someone isn’t necessarily a personal flaw, or something we can avoid. There are a couple of reasons why falling in love with the idea of someone is a nearly universal human experience when it comes to romantic love.

First, humans are social creatures who are wired for connection. As a species, humans evolved and survived by partnering with others and procreating. Although in modern society we can meet our needs for human connection differently without necessarily choosing a romantic partner, the majority of people still choose it.

The “rose-colored glasses” effect serves an evolutionary function of drawing us in and forging a bond with the other person. It’s a protective effect; if we saw the flaws first, they would repel us, and we would never be able to build a connection with anyone.

In other words, falling in love with the idea of someone is a natural process that is nearly impossible to avoid. When we can acknowledge and accept that, we can bring more self-awareness to our relationships and move forward with mindfulness.

The other dynamic at play is that most people are nervous to be their real selves in the beginning of a relationship. You’re only seeing the parts you’re willing to show each other. As you and your partner spend more time together and start to build trust, you feel more safe to be your authentic selves, even the messy parts, and that’s when the dynamic tends to shift.

How to Get to Know Someone for Real in the Age of Online Dating

As mentioned above, the “rose-colored glasses” effect serves a purpose of forging an initial bond with a new partner and it isn’t realistic to think we can completely avoid it. There is always risk involved in getting to know someone romantically, and it may feel even more risky to get to know someone you found via an app.

Here are some tips to navigate the “getting to know you” stage of dating:

• Learn to tolerate some awkwardness. The advent of online dating has its perks; for many, it has significantly widened the pool of potential partners, creating more opportunities to find someone whose interests and values match our own, versus mere proximity. Yet with more options than ever, it has perhaps created an illusion of perfection and control. If one date is a little awkward or uncomfortable, we can always hop back on the app and find someone else, right? Try to be mindful of that instinct. Being our imperfect, human selves is essential to build real intimacy, but we might never experience it if we run back to the apps whenever we feel a little discomfort. It can take time to feel at ease with people.

• Beware the “no spark” fallacy. It’s hard to be your best, most comfortable self on a first date because each person brings expectations to it. People can surprise you, but they might need more than one two-hour conversation to open up and be their real selves. Accept that you might not immediately feel “the spark” and that it may take a few more times of interacting with someone to see all facets of them and discern whether there’s a connection there worth pursuing.

• Give it time. For many partners who find each other online, one common challenge is that there is little to no community overlap. They have no friends, classmates, or coworkers in common, and therefore have no baseline for understanding how this person interacts with others. In romantic relationships, we’re looking to track behavior over time and make a decision about whether or not this person is right for us. When there is no overlap in social circles, it takes more time to fill in this essential gap.

Am I Idealizing My Partner? How to Check In with Yourself

If you meet someone and hit it off romantically, you might be worried about whether you’re seeing them and your relationship clearly, especially if you’ve experienced betrayal with a previous partner. As mentioned above, the goal is to track behavior over time. Anyone can say anything about who they are and what they want; you need time to observe what their actions are saying. Here are a few questions to ask yourself when you’re worried about whether someone is really a good fit for you:

• What is the story I’m telling myself about their behavior? For example, if the person is not consistent about texting you back or communicating with you, does it make you question your worthiness, or whether their lack of communication means they don’t care for you as strongly as you care for them?

• Conflict is a part of building lasting intimacy; a low or no-conflict dynamic is often (but not always) a sign that partners don’t feel safe being honest with each other and expressing disagreement. If you and your partner have had low or no conflict, it’s time to ask: are you still in an idealizing phase? Are you still treating each other too carefully? Do you feel safe confronting them about an issue, if it comes up?

What To Do When the Rose-Colored Glasses Come Off

Even though the “rose-colored glasses” phase is a natural part of bonding with someone romantically, it is indeed just a phase, and eventually your perception of each other will change and the dynamic will shift, for better or for worse. You will likely have moments of “this person isn’t who I thought they were” or “this relationship isn’t what I thought it was.” This isn’t a sign that the relationship is doomed, or that either of you failed to see each other clearly. It’s important to normalize this experience and see it as an opportunity to appreciate that person for who they truly are. This process is a chance to build real, lasting intimacy with someone and forge deeper bonds, or make an informed decision that you’re not right for each other.

When conflict or disagreement arises, here are some ways to practice authenticity (both allowing yourself to be honest with them, and allowing them to be honest with you.)

• Take ownership of the story you’re telling yourself about their behavior, e.g., “you never text me back, it makes me feel like I’m not worthy of your time & attention” or “ “you always show up late to things, that makes me feel like you don’t care.”

• Give the other person space to respond honestly; it will reveal a lot about their ability to handle conflict. They may admit that they’re acting in a certain way because they don’t feel this relationship is right for them, or they might share that their behavior is a reflection of a deeper personal struggle, like an insecurity that they have. If you get the sense that they’re deflecting or denying your experience and feelings, that’s cause for concern.

Remember, the beginning of a relationship is when you’re establishing boundaries and power dynamics are being negotiated. People are often afraid of conflict in the beginning, but it’s a chance to negotiate these dynamics in good faith. Avoiding conflict is also avoiding real intimacy.

How to Build Real Intimacy with a Romantic Partner

We humans are complicated creatures. Don’t let the memes fool you; we’re all liable to fall in love with the idea of someone and have a “rose-colored glasses” phase.

Just make sure that you take ownership of your own role in the relationship:

• Your own needs, desires, and deal-breakers

• Your own growth (therapy!)

• Don’t fault the other person when they’re not able to live up to the ideal

• Don’t fault yourself for what’s actually a pretty natural process that serves a purpose

Relationship Therapy for Individuals and Partners

Building real intimacy with another person is hard work. From the expectations we bring to our relationships to the emotional wounds that we’re still trying to heal, dating and romantic partnerships can be fraught.

ECC therapists are here to help you grapple with the discomfort and uncertainty of connecting with others, learning how to form secure attachments, and build authentic relationships. At Empowered Connections Counseling in Chicago, we support individuals in every stage of the journey, whether you’re single, happily partnered, healing from heartbreak or loss of a partner, or recovering from abuse or betrayal. We also support all types of identities and relationships: straight, LGBTQIA+, monogamous, polyamorous, partnered, married, or divorced. Together, we can help you find the right therapist and therapy approach to forge healthy, meaningful connections in your life. Reach out today to book a session.

About ECC:

Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for adults, children & teens, relationships, and families in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we work with clients to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit their needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.

Practicing Self-Love Around Valentine's Day

Valentine’s Day as it is celebrated in modern culture is a chance to celebrate romantic love, yet it can also be a painful reminder if you’re currently single, have recently lost or ended a relationship with a romantic partner, or are processing relationship trauma. Even in a relatively healthy partnership, Valentine’s Day can be fraught with social pressures to demonstrate romantic commitment in certain ways like expensive gifts and romantic dates. It’s all too easy to feel disappointment, grief, or stress around Valentine’s Day, which is why practicing self-love and compassion are important. Here are a few therapy tips for honoring your authentic needs and values around Valentine’s Day.

What Do Your Feelings Tell You About Your Needs, Values, and Beliefs

First, let’s do a little check in: how are you feeling about the upcoming Valentine’s Day? Are you dreading it, excited about it? Annoyed by it? Stressed or anxious about it? Our feelings and expectations about holidays like Valentine’s Day are often signs of deeper issues that we need to address, from misguided beliefs to unmet needs.

For example, if you’re single and dreading the holiday, perhaps you’re struggling with what you believe your relationship status says about your worth (e.g., I’m alone because I’m unlovable). Or perhaps you’re in a relationship, but you’re feeling anxious about whether you can fulfill your partner’s expectations for a romantic evening (i.e., if I don’t come up with an extravagant gift, she’ll dump me) or the opposite (i.e., if he doesn’t make plans to celebrate with me, is it a sign that he doesn’t love me?) These fears are often signals of unmet needs or mismatched expectations about how you can express love and care for each other.

It’s important to take time to reflect on your feelings and expectations, and try to dig down to the thing beneath the thing—what are my feelings telling me about my beliefs, needs and values about this holiday?—and acknowledge those deeper issues with compassion, curiosity, and a commitment to honoring your needs.

Self-Love Practices for Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day, like any holiday, comes with its share of social pressures that may have more of a negative impact than a positive one. Whether you’re single or partnered, it’s important for your mental health to practice self-love. Your relationship to yourself is the most important one you have, after all. Here are a few self-love practices that can help you stay emotionally grounded around Valentine’s Day.

• Take time to love yourself with a little self-care. Be generous and kind to yourself, in whatever way you’re able - it could be taking a solo hike, scheduling a massage, or making time to do a creative activity that you don’t usually have time for. Whatever you choose, the goal is to nurture your mental and physical well-being.

• Practice gratitude and appreciation, both for the relationships that are meaningful to you (romantic or not) and for yourself. Although we often go through our days with a fleeting sense of gratitude in the moment, we can make space to practice gratitude intentionally; for example, you could write down a list of relationships in your life and the qualities within those relationships you’re grateful for. You can also practice gratitude for yourself by engaging in a loving kindness meditation, like this one from Tara Brach.

• Set healthy boundaries in your relationships. Now is a good time to take stock of your relationships (every kind) and check in with yourself about how you want to be treated, and how you want to treat others. If things between you and another person are feeling out of sorts, follow these steps for setting healthy boundaries.

• Ask for what you need from friends, partners, or family. Similar to setting healthy boundaries, being clear about your needs with your loved ones is a way to honor yourself and improve your relationship to others at the same time. For example, if you’re feeling grief this Valentine’s Day over a loss or a breakup, be honest about your feelings and ask for support.

• Build community connections. There are many types of love to celebrate, and there are many people who need love but are not romantically partnered. Modern western culture places much more emphasis on monogamous romantic partnerships than it used to, often at the expense of communal connections. Valentine’s Day is a great opportunity to lend your time and attention to community activities that build loving connection in non-romantic ways, like volunteering your time at a senior living facility, shelter for the unhoused, or a hospital ward.

Mental Health Support Around Valentine’s Day

Self-love is the work of a lifetime. Everyone struggles to be kind to themselves and improve their mental health; it’s important to know that you’re not alone. Meeting with a therapist can help you connect with your emotions, clarify your needs, and revise the story you tell yourself about your life, your relationships, and your ability to connect with others.

At Empowered Connections Counseling in Chicago, our group of multidisciplinary therapists provide mental health support for individuals and relationships of diverse backgrounds and experiences: whether you’re single, healing from heartbreak or loss of a partner, recovering from intimate partner violence or betrayal, or you and your partner(s) are straight, LGBTQIA+, monogamous or polyamorous. We’re committed to helping you find the right therapist and strategy to strengthen your mental health, self-esteem, and relationship bonds. Book an appointment today to get started.

About ECC:

Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for adults, children & teens, relationships, and families in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we work with clients to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit their needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.

Counseling vs Therapy: What's the Difference?

If you’ve never sought or received mental health services before, it can be difficult discerning the differences between the different types (therapy, counseling, or psychiatric help) and deciding which is the right fit for your needs. Here's a quick primer to better understand the differences between different types of mental healthcare services so that you can choose the treatment that will best support you.

First: What Do the Letters After a Mental Health Professional’s Name Mean?

Different types of mental health services depend on the level of education and type of training that practitioners have. The letters that come after their name are an indicator of the license(s) they have earned and the services they are authorized to provide:

• Counselors typically earn master’s level degrees as Licensed Mental Health Counselors, LMHC, and Licensed Professional Counselors, LPC.

• Licensed therapists earn master’s level degrees as Licensed Clinical Social Workers, LCSW, and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists, LMFT.

• Psychologists & Psychiatrists earn doctorate-level degrees. While both specialize in the field of mental health, they differ in their focus and practices.

  • Psychologists are trained to diagnose and treat mental health disorders, and often work in collaboration with psychiatrists and other healthcare professionals to provide holistic treatment to their patients, but they cannot prescribe medication or perform medical procedures.

  • Psychiatrists are medical doctors for psychological conditions and have authorization to treat patients with medications or medical procedures.

While qualifications are helpful indicators for the type of service practitioners provide, they’re not an indication of quality or effectiveness of treatment.

What’s the Difference Between Therapy and Counseling?

Therapy/counseling or therapist/counselor are terms that are often used interchangeably to refer to mental health treatment. While their education and training may differ, many therapists and counselors generally use similar approaches to talk therapy. In the past, counselors often specialized in behavioral approaches to address short-term goals in specific areas such as addictions, relationships, or grief, while therapists have specialized in longer term and holistic approaches. Counselors also typically have had more training in community mental health practices. However, these delineations between therapy and counseling have softened over time and there are many similarities between client experiences.

What makes a difference in the effectiveness of a client’s mental health treatment is not so much the licensure or extent of a practitioner’s education, or even the therapeutic method a practitioner uses, but the bond that the practitioner and the client build, as well the client’s commitment to healing and changing their life. (Read more about this in our post “What Matters More: The Therapy Method or the Therapist?”) When seeking mental health treatment, it’s important to pay attention to whether you feel comfortable being vulnerable with your therapist or counselor, and whether their insights and support are helpful for addressing your needs. If not, it’s okay to continue your search until you find the right fit.

When to Seek Therapy/Counseling vs a Psychiatrist or Psychologist

According to the American Psychological Association, a general rule of thumb for knowing it’s time to pursue mental health support is when something in your life is causing distress that interferes with your life. It could be depression or anxiety, an addiction or disorder, a relationship conflict, a major life transition (jobs, new parenthood, divorce), a loss or death, or another traumatic experience. Choosing which type of mental health service depends on the type of presenting issue you're experiencing and how acute you feel it is, but it is very common for mental health professionals to refer clients to other mental health professionals that can offer additional services to address the issue, if needed. For example, if you seek therapy for depression and anxiety, you and your therapist may decide that medication is needed to further improve your condition. At that point, your therapist will refer you to a psychiatrist, and you will likely see both professionals on a regular basis. Similarly, it is common for clients to seek psychiatric help for acute depression and anxiety, and in addition to prescribing medication, the psychiatrist might refer you to a psychologist or therapist if you don’t already see one. The goal is that you should experience holistic care, and sometimes that takes more than one type of mental health service.

Mental Health Services in Chicago

You may not find the right fit with a therapist on the first try, but the good news is that there is a vast network of licensed practitioners ready to help you find the support you need, even if that means referring you to another professional for additional support. All you need to do is take that first step to reach out and ask for help.

At ECC Chicago, we offer a multidisciplinary approach to mental health care, with a diverse team of licensed therapists and counselors who specialize in a number of different research-backed therapeutic approaches, including Emotionally-Focused Therapy, Attachment-Based Therapy, Diagnostic Behavior Therapy, Internal Family Systems, Narrative Therapy, EMDR, and more. We provide referrals to psychologists and psychiatrists, as needed. We’re committed to helping you find the right therapy method and practitioner to address your unique needs. If you’re ready to take that first step to seek support, we’ll help you find the right fit.

About ECC

Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for adults, children & teens, relationships, and families in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we can work with you to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit your needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.

Dialectical Behavior Therapy: Accepting Reality & Embracing Change

*Content Note: This post will mention sensitive topics such as suicidal ideation, self-harm, and invasive thoughts.

Do you ever feel like managing emotional dysregulation is a full-time job? Like your emotions are running the show, and it’s hard to function or focus on anything else? When tricky situations happen and the emotions feel overwhelming, do you resort to behaviors you know are harmful, such as cutting, binge-eating, or drinking? If you’ve suffered a serious loss or trauma, or you’re experiencing acute depression or anxiety, Dialectical Behavior Therapy is a method that might help you tolerate stress with healthy habits and access emotional equilibrium.

What is Dialectical Behavior Therapy?

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a type of talk therapy based on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) that has been adapted for those who need help managing and regulating intense emotions. Unlike CBT which focuses on changing an individual’s thought patterns, DBT is focused on giving clients skills to manage their emotional dysregulation. DBT is especially effective for people of all ages who suffer from mood disorders such as depression and anxiety, severe PTSD, suicidal ideation, self-harm, substance abuse, disordered eating, or other issues.

Maladaptive coping skills like substance abuse and self-harm are forged from traumatic experiences when healthy coping skills (like talking to a safe adult) aren’t accessible. These maladaptive strategies may offer immediate relief by easing or numbing the emotional pain, but they also pose risks to a person’s emotional, mental, and physical health that further increase dysregulation. Oftentimes, clients want to end these maladaptive behaviors but need help replacing them with healthier coping mechanisms. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy is all about redirecting behavior to better manage emotional dysregulation through:

• Acceptance of reality

• Awareness of emotions

• Healthier coping mechanisms, like mindfulness techniques

Two Things Can Be True

“Dialectical” refers to the act of accepting contradictory ideas. For example, someone who has a severe mood disorder can accept that their brain chemistry makes it difficult for them to feel safe and happy, while at the same time choosing to stop engaging in self-harm behaviors with help from a DBT therapist.

DBT is about “walking the middle path” between two things, i.e., building awareness of the emotions without acting on the impulses. Clients in DBT are coached on how to tolerate intense emotions and accept painful realities without engaging in maladaptive behaviors such as cutting or disordered eating.

Managing Dysregulation with Mindfulness

Of course, ending maladaptive behaviors isn’t as simple as stopping. We have to replace the maladaptive impulse with healthier skills that decrease emotional dysregulation. In Dialectical Behavior Therapy, therapists work with clients on mindfulness activities to help them ride the wave of discomfort without action or judgment. Many of these activities employ acronyms that are easy to recall in the middle of dysregulation, such as the STOP and RAIN methods.

The STOP mindfulness technique stands for:

• Stop

• Take a breath

• Observe your thoughts and feelings

• Proceed, i.e., return to what you were doing before you stopped, but with more awareness

The RAIN mindfulness technique stands for:

• Recognize what’s happening in the moment

• Allow the experience to exist just as it is

• Investigate with interest and care

• Nurture with self-compassion

The Benefits of DBT

Dialectical Behavior Therapy offers many benefits, whether its for individuals, couples, or families:

• Greater self-awareness: individuals learn how to notice their emotions and identify cycles of self-harm.

• Emotional resilience: clients can also learn to tolerate stress through mindfulness techniques, so that when difficult situations or emotions occur, they can stay present and emotionally regulate themselves.

• Interpersonal effectiveness: in couples or group therapy settings, DBT gives clients the chance to practice communicating their emotions, slow down the conversation, and identify what’s important to say and how to say it, so that their needs are met.

Is DBT Right for Me?

As mentioned above, Dialectical Behavior Therapy can be applied in a variety of contexts, from individuals (including children) to couples and families. Here are a few signs that DBT might be right for you:

• You find it hard to stay present when difficult emotions arise

• You struggle with impulsive or compulsive behaviors when feeling overwhelmed

• You have severe anxiety and depression

• You have an eating disorder

• You’re struggling with substance abuse

• You’re struggling with suicidal ideation or intrusive thoughts

DBT Therapy in Chicago:

Suffering happens when we get stuck in a cycle trying to change something we can’t, but acceptance is a skill we can learn. Some things about our lives may always be painful or difficult, but through practicing acceptance and mindfulness, we can end cycles of self-harm and find emotional equilibrium. DBT can be a profound and transformative therapeutic experience that sets people on a path toward peace. If you’re curious about whether DBT is right for you, your child, or your family, reach out today. We’ll connect you with the therapist and therapeutic approach to help you thrive.

For more information about Dialectical Behavior Therapy, watch this video of ECC Founder Danielle Zawadski discussing it on PHTV4’s Living Well segment!

About ECC:

Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for adults, children & teens, relationships, and families in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we work with clients to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit their needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.

New Year, Same You: A Guide for Healthy Resolutions

The new year is a clean slate, a chance to set intentions and try new ways of caring for yourself, your body, your aspirations, your relationships, your career… And yet, we’re all familiar with those feelings of shame and disappointment when we fall short of our resolutions. Self-compassion often takes a backseat to the goal we’re trying to achieve, and before we know it, we’ve failed to keep up with the rigorous diet and exercise routine, or trying to stay sober, and we’re deep in shame about it.

Now that we’re several days into 2024, it’s a good time to check in and make sure the goals we’re setting feel attainable. If you’re looking for guidance on how to meet this new year with hope for improving our lives in meaningful and lasting ways, here are a few therapy-based tips.

Why We Fail at New Year’s Resolutions

The thing about new years and resolutions is that we are still our same human selves, facing the same familiar stressors as last year (which was just days or weeks ago). What we know from decades of psychology studies on human behavior is that the more rigid and unrealistic our expectations for ourselves, the harder time we will have meeting those expectations – and caring for ourselves when we fall short.

This can create a vicious cycle of failure and shame:

• We set a resolution that we have a hard time living up to,

• Then we fail and feel angry and ashamed of ourselves,

• Then we double-down on our efforts, but still fall short

• Then we feel incapable and struggle with self-esteem, so we stop trying to achieve the resolution—or any resolution at all. (Meta-emotional cycles can exacerbate this.)

When we’re caught in this cycle, tapping into self-compassion and care becomes extremely difficult. The more ashamed we feel, the less likely we are to reach out to anyone for support, and loneliness becomes another factor that can worsen these feelings of shame and inadequacy.

How to Get Out of the Shame Cycle of Failed New Year’s Resolutions

Okay, so you set a goal that you couldn’t live up to, for one reason or another. Now what? You could scrap the whole idea of doing anything differently this year and just accept that you’re not capable of change, or… you could tap into self-compassion. One way to move forward with self-compassion and find hope with your new year resolutions is to honor your motivations while adjusting your goals. You’re self-aware enough to know that the way you’ve been doing things isn’t how you want to keep doing them. Honor your desire for change. But how that change can look is fluid and you have the agency to adjust your goals and strategies in a way that feels more comfortable and attainable.

The moment when we fail to follow our resolution or achieve the goal is a moment to check in with ourselves and reflect on our actions and feelings without judgment. What is our intuition telling us?

For example, let’s say your new year’s goal is to lose a certain amount of weight by following a strict nutrition plan you found online and go to the gym every weekday morning at 6AM. When you fail to either achieve the number on the scale or follow through with the routine, you could double-down by trying harder and being more strict with your habits, or you could take a moment to check in with your body’s needs and reflect on the motivation behind your resolution. Are you full or hungry? Do you need to rest, or do you have the urge to move? Do you want to change your diet and exercise habits because you want to be healthier, or because you’re self-conscious about the number on the scale? What would it look like to honor your desire for change, while also honoring your body’s needs?

Approach the New Year with Mindfulness

We’re all going to encounter moments this year where we’re disappointed with ourselves, ashamed of the ways we’re falling short, worried that we’re not capable of all that we hoped. Mindfulness is a really effective therapeutic tool that you can access in those tricky emotional moments to stop shame in its tracks, access self-compassion, and find a way forward. There are many different mindfulness strategies that can help regulate your emotions, but all of them involve some form of pausing when we feel emotionally dysregulated (anxious, frustrated, depressed), engaging the five senses to reconnect with our bodies, taking a moment to notice our emotions and investigate what triggered them, and moving forward with self-compassion.

Getting Support to Create Meaningful Change

Making meaningful, lasting change in your life is hard work! You don’t have to do it alone. If you’re struggling to form goals and find strategies for change that feel healthy and effective, therapy can help. You can talk with a therapist about what your hopes are, what your obstacles are, and find a path forward that feels right for you. At ECC, our diverse, multidisciplinary team of therapists can help you create a life that makes you feel happy and whole. Change is possible.

About ECC:

Empowered Connections Counseling is a practice of licensed therapists providing quality, multidisciplinary counseling for adults, children & teens, relationships, and families in Chicago and across Illinois. Whether by in-person session or via telehealth, we work with clients to find the therapist and treatment methods that best suit their needs. Connect meaningfully with your life by booking an appointment today.